(Jake is lying on the settee in the dark.)
SISKO: I didn't expect to find you here. I thought you'd be down on the Promenade, helping Mardah put up the decorations for the Bajoran Gratitude Festival.
JAKE: That was the plan, but it turns out I don't have much to be grateful for.
SISKO: Isn't that the earring you
JAKE: Bought for Mardah. Yeah, you want it? Maybe you can give it to Major Kira for her next birthday or something.
SISKO: All right, tell me about it.
JAKE: Mardah's gone, Dad. She got accepted to the Science Academy on Regulus Three.
SISKO: That's a good school.
JAKE: It's three hundred light years away.
SISKO: Jake, you're sixteen. Take my word for it, you'll survive. Sooner or later you'll find someone else. Who knows, maybe you'll find someone tonight at the Gratitude Festival.
JAKE: Yeah, sure.
SISKO: Jake, the whole point of the Festival is to put all your troubles behind you and make a new start.
JAKE: I could use one. Okay, I'll go.
SISKO: Good. That's the spirit.
JAKE: But I'm not going to have any fun.
SISKO: Oh.

[Replimat]

BASHIR: Nervous, Chief?
O'BRIEN: What are you talking about?
BASHIR: That's your fifth cup of coffee in twenty minutes.
O'BRIEN: I didn't realise you were keeping track.
BASHIR: Nervous and irascible.
O'BRIEN: If you hadn't seen your wife and child for two months, you'd be irascible too.
BASHIR: Believe me, I'm looking forward to Keiko and Molly's visit just as much as you are.
O'BRIEN: I doubt that.
BASHIR: How many games of racquetball have we played in the last two months?
O'BRIEN: I don't know. Fifteen, maybe twenty.
BASHIR: No, try seventy. I've been keeping track of that, too. And you know what all those games have proved to me? That I'm a poor substitute for your wife.
O'BRIEN: I could've told you that sixty games ago. Thing is, they're only going to be here for two days. That's barely enough time to say hello. Then they're back to Bajor again for four more months.
BASHIR: Four months. Why that's another hundred and fifty games of racquetball. I don't think my elbow can take that kind of abuse. Maybe you can try and convince her to stay.
O'BRIEN: Oh, no. I can't do that. I'm the one who suggested she go on this agrobiology expedition in the first place. No, we're just going to have to make the best of the little time we have. Which means we can't waste a second of the next two days.

[Promenade]

KIRA: Peldor joi, Odo.
ODO: Peldor joi to you too, Major. Well, it's, er, it's hard to believe the Promenade is this empty at midday.
KIRA: Calm before the storm. In a few hours, this place will be packed with Bajorans celebrating the Festival.
ODO: Actually, I was thinking of joining you this year.
KIRA: Really?
ODO: I don't see why not. None of my Bajoran deputies work during the Gratitude Festival. Why should I? Besides, if I'm going to live here with you humanoids, I may as well immerse myself in your rituals.
KIRA: Well then, we'll see each other later.
ODO: I'd like that, if you're not too busy being the Presider at the Festival.
KIRA: For you, I will make time, Odo. Just look for me. I'll be with Bareil.
ODO: Oh. I thought he'd be celebrating the Festival on Bajor.
KIRA: So did I. I'm glad I was wrong. He's arriving on the next shuttle.
ODO: Well, you'd better go. It'll be here soon.
KIRA: You're right. I'll see you at the Festival.

[Corridor]

(O'Brien is pacing outside the airlock.)
KIRA: Chief?
O'BRIEN: Major. Keiko.
KIRA: Ah. Bareil.
O'BRIEN: Good luck.
KIRA: You too.
(The airlock opens and Bareil enters)
BAREIL: Nerys. I am so glad to see you.
KIRA: I've missed you.
BAREIL: I've missed you, too.
(Kira and Bareil kiss then leave)
KEIKO: Miles? Miles?
O'BRIEN: Keiko, I'm so glad to see you.
(Keiko and Molly sit on the step.)
KEIKO: I have had the worst trip.
O'BRIEN: Oh really? I'm sorry to hear that. Now that you're here, everything's going to be great. Hello, sweetie. You ready to have a great time with your Dad?
MOLLY: No.
O'BRIEN: Why not?
MOLLY: I don't feel so good.
O'BRIEN: Really? Oh. Tell Daddy what's wrong.
(We don't see it, but she throws up in his lap.)
LWAXANA: Oh, you poor dear. I should never have given you all that candy.

[Security office]

(Odo is briefing his Starfleet stand-in for the Festival.)
ODO: I usually make it a point to drop by Quark's three or four times a day at random intervals, just to let him know that I'm thinking about him. But seeing today is a holiday, he'll be busier than usual. I suggest you station a man there full time. I think that about covers it. If you need me, I'll be on the Promenade.
LWAXANA: But don't call unless it's an emergency. The Constable will be occupied.
ODO: Madame Ambassador.
LWAXANA: Oh, do we have to be so formal?
(She hugs Odo)
LWAXANA: Didn't they teach you any manners in Starfleet Academy? Be a dear, run along. The Constable and I have a lot of catching up to do.
ODO: Come back in five minutes.
LWAXANA: Make that half an hour.
(The Security Officer leaves with a grin.)
ODO: So, what brings you to the station.
LWAXANA: Officially I'm here as the Betazoid representative to the Gratitude Festival. But the truth is, I came to see you, you poor sweet tortured man.
ODO: Excuse me?
LWAXANA: I know the torment you must be going through. To spend your whole life searching for your people only to discover that they're the leaders of that awful Dominion.
ODO: You heard about that?
LWAXANA: Odo, don't worry. I'm here to help you.
ODO: What kind of help do you mean?
LWAXANA: A sympathetic ear, a shoulder to cry on. A lap to melt in.
ODO: Well, that's very considerate of you, but unnecessary. My people are who they are, and I am who I am. I've learned to accept that.
LWAXANA: You brave soul. Why don't we go someplace quiet, and you can tell me all about it.
ODO: Actually, I was planning to attend the opening of the Gratitude Festival this afternoon.
LWAXANA: Oh, well, even better. First a little fun and relaxation, and then we can delve into the depths of your pain. I'll freshen up, and meet you in front of the Bajoran Temple for the Presider's opening address. I promise you, Odo, you'll never be alone again.

[Turbolift]

LWAXANA: Level twenty three, section eight.
(She gets a sudden stabbing headache.)

[Kira's quarters]

(Kira stretches out on the chaise-longue.)
KIRA: We need to see each other more often.
BAREIL: I wish we both weren't so busy. I never expected Kai Winn to make me one of her principal advisors.
KIRA: I think she asks your advice just so that she can do the exact opposite of what you recommend.
BAREIL: I know you don't like Winn, but the office has changed her. The Prophets chose well. So why don't we leave spiritual matters in their capable hands and concentrate on enjoying ourselves?
KIRA: I have to go.
BAREIL: The Festival doesn't start for an hour.
KIRA: But I have to set up the Renewal scrolls along the Promenade. But it won't take long. Jadzia's promised to help me.
BAREIL: Jadzia, of course. I've never understood how the two of you could be such good friends. She's so unpredictable and you're so
KIRA: Predictable?
BAREIL: I didn't mean it like that. It's just that she gets to spend so much more time with you than I do.
KIRA: Jadzia and I have been doing this for the past two years. It's becoming a tradition.
BAREIL: I was hoping we could start a few traditions of our own.
KIRA: We will. Later tonight.

[O'Brien's quarters]

O'BRIEN: Is she asleep?
KEIKO: It looks like the medicine Doctor Bashir prescribed is working.
O'BRIEN: That's a relief. Rough trip?
KEIKO: It was a disaster. I thought it would never end.
O'BRIEN: Well, I'm glad you're home.
KEIKO: Me too.
O'BRIEN: We should get ready for the Festival. The babysitter'll be here any minute.
KEIKO: Ah. The Festival.
O'BRIEN: On the other hand, we could spend the rest of day locked away in our quarters.
KEIKO: Miles, what I really want to do is sleep.
O'BRIEN: Then maybe you should.
KEIKO: Miles, I didn't say I was going to. I just meant I could use some.
O'BRIEN: That's okay. If you need to sleep, go ahead. I'll understand.
KEIKO: No, you won't. You'll be disappointed and you'll start brooding and stomping around like an Andorian Bull.
O'BRIEN: Look, go or stay, sleep or don't, it's all the same to me. Just tell me what you want to do and we'll do it.
KEIKO: Miles, I've been making decisions all day long. You decide.
O'BRIEN: Okay. We'll go to the Festival. But we don't have to go right away. I mean, you can take some time to relax and change into something nice.
KEIKO: Nice?
O'BRIEN: Yeah, like your red dress.
KEIKO: My red dress? Really?
O'BRIEN: Is there something wrong with your red dress?
KEIKO: No, it's just a little tight, that's all.
O'BRIEN: That's the way I like it.
KEIKO: All right. If it'll make you happy, I'll wear the red dress.
O'BRIEN: Forget the red dress, okay? Just wear whatever you want.
KEIKO: Look, let's just try to enjoy the next two days. I'll change into something nice and we'll go to the Festival, okay?
O'BRIEN: Fine.
(Keiko goes into the bedroom.)
O'BRIEN: I can hardly wait.

[Outside the Shrine]

(A child strikes a gong to summon the people. Kira stands on a dais.)
KIRA: Tesra Peldor impatri bren.
(She puts a clear and a blue liquid into a glass tube. They mix and run down to a brazier.)
KIRA: Bentel vetan ullon sten.
(The brazier bursts into flames.)
KIRA: And now, I have the honour of placing the first Renewal Scroll into the fire. As the scrolls burn, may our troubles turn to ashes with them. And now, for the next twenty-six hours, I expect you all to enjoy yourselves. I know I will. May the Prophets walk with us.
(Lwaxana gets a headache. So do Bareil and Jake)
SISKO: Jake, are you all right?
JAKE: Just felt funny there for a second.
SISKO: You sure you're all right?
JAKE: Yeah, Dad. Never felt better.

[Promenade]

KIRA: Bareil? What are you looking for?
BAREIL: Oh, nothing. Just looking.
JAKE: Peldor joi.
(Jake gives Kira a jumja stick. Bareil starts to wander off.)
KIRA: Oh Jake, how thoughtful. Thank you.
JAKE: I know you're busy, but can I talk to you for a second?
KIRA: Sure.
JAKE: In private. It's kind of personal.
KIRA: I'll be right back. Now, Jake, what can I do for you?
JAKE: I need some advice. You see, there's this older woman and I think we're perfect for each other.
KIRA: Ah. And she doesn't.
JAKE: I don't know what she thinks.
KIRA: Well, Jake, my advice to you is to tell Mardah how you feel. That way you'll know
JAKE: Mardah and I broke up.
KIRA: You broke up? Well then who?
JAKE: You.
KIRA: Me?
JAKE: I love you, Nerys. Want to go out with me?

[Outside the Shrine]

(Dax is reading Morn's scroll.)
DAX: Morn, I can't believe a handsome, fun-loving guy like you could have so many problems. My advice to you is to burn this as quickly as possible and don't look back.
(So he does)
BAREIL: Sage advice.
DAX: Vedek Bareil, it's good to see you.
BAREIL: You have such a wise, generous spirit. I only wish I had a friend like you.
DAX: I think of you as a friend.
BAREIL: You mean that?
DAX: Of course.
BAREIL: I'm glad. Because I was hoping that you and I could get to know each other better. A lot better.
(Bareil puts him hand on Dax's knee.)
DAX: Excuse me.

[Promenade - upper level]

(Odo is enjoying the live music when he is grabbed by Lwaxana.)
LWAXANA: I love Bajoran music. It's so intelligent, so vital. It reminds me of you. Dance with me, Odo.
ODO: I'm sorry, I don't dance.
LWAXANA: Nonsense. I saw you moving to the music.
ODO: That wasn't dancing. That was swaying.
LWAXANA: Then sway with me, Odo. Sway with me.
ODO: I just remembered, I'm needed in Security.
LWAXANA: I'll come with you.
ODO: Hello, Lieutenant. Having a good time?
DAX: No.
(Lwaxana's head aches, and so does Dax's)

[Quark's]

QUARK: That's right genuine latinum-plated Renewal Scroll inscription pens. Blessed by Vedek Redab himself shortly before he passed away. Each pen is engraved with the words Deep Space Nine's Third Annual Gratitude Festival, today's date, and a lovely portrait of the station by Ermat Zimm. So get them while you can. They're sure to become collector's items.
(Ermat Zimm will be Herman Zimmerman, I presume. Odo and Lwaxana are sitting at a table. She is entranced by the jugglers and acrobats. Upstairs - )

[Quark's cafe]

O'BRIEN: So, what do you say we take a walk around the Promenade for a little while?
KEIKO: I'd rather stay here. I never thought I'd say this, but I kind of miss Quark's. The noise, the excitement, our table.
O'BRIEN: You know, I haven't sat here since you've been gone.
KEIKO: That's so sweet.
O'BRIEN: So, how's the survey been going?
KEIKO: The terrain's rougher than we expected, and the ecosystem's a lot more diverse than it looked from the orbital scans. All in all, it's been pretty gruelling.
O'BRIEN: Really?
KEIKO: Don't get me wrong, I'm having a wonderful time.
O'BRIEN: That's good.
KEIKO: There is one problem I have to talk to you about. It looks like the project's taking longer than we hoped.
O'BRIEN: What do you mean, longer?
KEIKO: You have to understand, Miles. Every valley has an entirely different ecosystem. There's a lot of work to be done.
O'BRIEN: How much longer is it going to take?
KEIKO: I'm not sure.
O'BRIEN: Try a guess. An extra couple of days, a week, two?
KEIKO: More like two or three months.
O'BRIEN: You're telling me you're going to be on Bajor for another seven months?
KEIKO: It's either that or ask them to find another botanist.
O'BRIEN: Maybe that's something worth considering.
KEIKO: Are you asking me to resign?
O'BRIEN: No. But another seven months?
KEIKO: I don't like this any more than you do.
O'BRIEN: You just said you were having a great time.
KEIKO: Oh, I'm sorry. I suppose you'd be happier if I was miserable?
O'BRIEN: I didn't say that.
KEIKO: Sebarr was right. I never should have mentioned it.
O'BRIEN: Who's Sebarr?
KEIKO: He's one of the zoologists I'm working with. He warned me not to talk to you about this until after the Gratitude Festival.
O'BRIEN: And who's he to be giving you advice?
KEIKO: He's a friend.
O'BRIEN: A friend? I thought you were down there working.
KEIKO: We are working.
O'BRIEN: Yeah, with time out for intimate little chats about our relationship. What else did you tell him about us?
KEIKO: Miles, you're behaving like a child. What do you want me to say?
O'BRIEN: I want you to say that you're not going back, that you're going to stay here with me.
KEIKO: Miles, right now I don't even want to sit at the same table with you.
O'BRIEN: Fine. Go on, leave. Go back to Bajor and your plants and Sebarr. See if I care.

[Promenade - upper level]

SISKO: Whoa, slow down.
JAKE: Hi, Dad.
SISKO: I've been looking all over for you. In case you've forgotten, we're hosting a Gratitude Dinner tonight in the wardroom. I could use your help in getting ready.
JAKE: I'm kind of busy right now, Dad. I have to find someone.
SISKO: Major Kira?
JAKE: How'd you know?
SISKO: I just spoke to her.
JAKE: Really? Where is she?
SISKO: Just hold on.
JAKE: But I have to talk to her. You know, you were right about me meeting someone at the Festival.
SISKO: I did not mean Major Kira.
JAKE: You like her, don't you?
SISKO: Of course I like her.
JAKE: Well so do I.
SISKO: Jake, what you're feeling now is just a crush. Look, Jake, right now you're confused, vulnerable, hurt. You miss Mardah
JAKE: Mardah was a mistake. She was too young, too immature for me. Major Kira is a woman.
SISKO: Major Kira is in love with Vedek Bareil.
JAKE: It won't last. He's always on Bajor. She needs someone who can be with her all the time. Like me.
SISKO: Jake, I don't want to see you hurt again.
JAKE: I appreciate that, but this is between Nerys and me. Don't worry. Everything's going to be fine. Thanks.

[Promenade]

(Having purchased a souvenir pen)
ODO: I really can't accept this.
LWAXANA: But I want you to have it. It's my gift to you.
ODO: That's very thoughtful but I have nothing to give you in return.
LWAXANA: Being with you is the only present I need. Now, come on. Let's go write our Renewal Scrolls.

[Quark's]

QUARK: Peldor joi, Chief. You look terrible.
O'BRIEN: Just a little headache, that's all.
QUARK: Here, have a free pen.
O'BRIEN: What for?
QUARK: To write down your problems on a Renewal Scroll.
O'BRIEN: There isn't a scroll long enough to hold all my problems.
QUARK: Really? I thought you could sum them up with one word. Keiko. Tell me I'm wrong. If you ask me, it's your own fault. You never should have let her go to Bajor in the first place.
O'BRIEN: What was I supposed to do? Force her to stay here with me?
QUARK: That would've been a good start. You humans, you never learn. You let your women go out in public, hold jobs, wear clothing, and you wonder why your marriages fall apart.
O'BRIEN: That's your solution, Quark, huh? Treat women like property?
QUARK: Criticise it all you want. But on the Ferengi homeworld, husbands and wives never argue. There's no divorce, no broken homes, nothing but peaceful conjugal bliss.
O'BRIEN: If Ferengi marriages are so wonderful, why are you still single?
QUARK: I haven't met the right woman yet.
O'BRIEN: Well, I have. She just walked out that door.
QUARK: And out of your life.
O'BRIEN: Not if I can help it.

[Corridor]

KIRA: Bareil. I was wondering where you disappeared to.
(He avoids her kiss.)
KIRA: Come on. You can do better than that.
BAREIL: Someone might see us.
KIRA: We are the only people here. Everyone else is on the Promenade. We have two hours before we're supposed to join Commander Sisko for dinner. That gives us some time to be alone together.
BAREIL: I can't.
KIRA: Why not?
BAREIL: I have to find Jadzia.
KIRA: Jadzia? Is something wrong?
BAREIL: No, not at all. Do you know where she is?
KIRA: She's probably on the Promenade.
BAREIL: She wasn't there the last time I looked.
KIRA: Why is it so important for you to see Jadzia?
BAREIL: I'll explain everything later. Thank you, Nerys.
KIRA: For what?
BAREIL: For being such a good friend.
KIRA: Friend?

[Wardroom]

(Or the Forest, if you've spotted the Shakespearian derivation by now...)
SISKO: Dax, what are you doing here?
DAX: I thought you might need some help getting ready for the party.
SISKO: Thanks, but that won't be necessary. Wouldn't you rather be celebrating on the Promenade?
DAX: No, thanks. I don't want to run into Vedek Bareil.
SISKO: Is there a problem between you?
DAX: He can't keep his hands off me.
SISKO: That doesn't sound like Vedek Bareil.
DAX: I couldn't believe it myself, but he wouldn't leave me alone. He's probably still out there looking for me.
SISKO: Have you told Kira?
DAX: I don't know how. It's going to break her heart.
SISKO: Someone has to tell her. Do you want me to do it?
DAX: Would you?
SISKO: Well, if you think that's the best way to handle it.
DAX: I'd really appreciate it, Benjamin. I mean, this whole thing is ridiculous. How could I be interested in Bareil? We both know it's always been you.
(Dax snuggles up on Sisko's lap.)
SISKO: Dax?
DAX: Mmm?
SISKO: What are you doing?
DAX: Making myself comfortable. Have I ever told you that you smell wonderful?
SISKO: You know, old man, I have to admit you had me going there for a minute.
DAX: Benjamin, stop acting so coy. There's no one around. I have an idea. You cancel the party, and then that way we can spend the evening alone together. What do you say?
SISKO: Sisko to Bashir.
BASHIR [OC]: Go ahead, Commander.
SISKO: Meet me in the Infirmary immediately.
BASHIR [OC]: Aye, sir.

[Infirmary]

BASHIR: Her vital signs are normal. Her brain activity is normal. No sign of infection or intoxication of any kind. She's the picture of health.
DAX: I told you.
SISKO: Then why did you put your head on my chest?
DAX: Oh, Julian, you should've seen his face. Admit it, you were this far away from total panic.
BASHIR: I think we've both been victims of a practical joke.
DAX: At least someone around here has a sense of humour. See you at the party, Julian.

[Promenade]

DAX: I've never been so embarrassed in my life, making me go through all those tests
SISKO: It's your fault, Dax. You took this one too far.
DAX: If I didn't love you so much, I'd be angry with you. See you at the party.

[Replimat]

(Kira pulls apart a decoration from my favourite bud vase. Honest, they're identical.)
JAKE: You look like you could use a little cheering up.
KIRA: Jake, do me a favour.
JAKE: Anything.
KIRA: Leave me alone.

[O'Brien's quarters]

(Molly is playing with her stuffed alien animals.)
O'BRIEN: Hi, sweetie.
MOLLY: Hi.
O'BRIEN: Feeling better?
MOLLY: Lots better.
O'BRIEN: Ah, that's what I wanted to hear. Where's Mommy?
MOLLY: In her room, sad.
O'BRIEN: Well, listen. Why don't you go and play with Piggy in your room for a while and we'll see if Daddy can cheer Mommy up?
(Molly leaves)
O'BRIEN: Keiko? It's me. Can I come in?
KEIKO [OC]: Not now, Miles.
O'BRIEN: You're right. I'm an idiot, sometimes. When I don't get my way, I can be selfish and childish and pigheaded. I said some things to you that were pretty stupid. I wish I could take them back. But even if it's too late for that, there's one thing I want you to know, Keiko. I love you. I always have, and I always will. I want you to know I've left a letter of resignation on Commander Sisko's desk. I'm ready to move down to Bajor with you tomorrow, if you'll have me. And after that if you want to move back to Earth, that's okay too. I'll do whatever it takes. I just don't want to lose you. Honey, did you hear what I said?
KEIKO [OC]: Yes.
O'BRIEN: And?
KEIKO [OC]: And I need time to think. Why don't you go to Commander Sisko's party? We can talk when you get back.
O'BRIEN: If that's what you want.

[Corridor]

(Lwaxana has Odo on one arm and Bashir on the other.)
ODO: Major. Aren't you headed in the wrong direction?
BASHIR: Commander Sisko's party?
KIRA: Oh, I'm not going.
LWAXANA: Why ever not?
KIRA: Because Bareil will be there.
ODO: I thought the two of you were very happy together.
KIRA: So did I. But it turns out he'd rather be with Dax than me. And to make matters worse, I have Jake Sisko chasing me around the station, professing his undying love.
BASHIR: That's strange. A little while ago, Jadzia had Commander Sisko convinced that she was in love with him. He even had me examine her to make sure she was all right. Apparently it was only a joke.
KIRA: Are you sure? People are acting very strangely today.
BASHIR: Maybe I should take another look at Jadzia's test results. Excuse me. Constable, Would you tell Commander Sisko that I'll be a little late?
(Lwaxana gets an ache. and so do Bashir and Kira.)
BASHIR: I should be getting to the Infirmary.
KIRA: I'll join you. Maybe you should examine Bareil and Jake while you're at it.
BASHIR: That wouldn't be a bad idea.

[Infirmary]

BASHIR: This won't take long.
(Kira and Bashir fall into each others arms.)

[Wardroom]

LWAXANA: What is it, Odo? I may not be able to read your emotions, but I can read your expression. Something's wrong.
ODO: I'm fine.
LWAXANA: I wish you'd tell me what's bothering you. Maybe it would help you.
ODO: As soon as something bothers me, I'll let you know. I promise.
LWAXANA: Why do I find stubborn men so attractive?
(Bareil is resting his chin on Dax's shoulder.)
DAX: Would you please stop following me?
BAREIL: Gladly, if you'll stop running away. I have something important to talk to you about.
DAX: Discuss it with Major Kira. I'm not interested.
JAKE: But Dad, you promised that Nerys would be here.
SISKO: She will. And stop calling her Nerys.
(Sisko gets his bottom pinched.)
DAX: Peldor joi.
LWAXANA: Oh, Commander, I didn't realise that you and Lieutenant Dax were that close.
SISKO: We're not. Sisko to Bashir. Computer, locate Doctor Bashir.
COMPUTER: Doctor Bashir is in the Infirmary.
SISKO: Constable, go get Doctor Bashir and bring him here immediately.
ODO: I'll be right back.
LWAXANA: I'll go with you.
ODO: Yes, of course you will.

[Infirmary]

(The hot date continues)
BASHIR: I wonder what Commander Sisko wanted?
KIRA: It can wait.
BASHIR: This is very embarrassing.
KIRA: We have to stop.
BASHIR: Definitely.
(Odo and Lwaxana enter.)
ODO: Doctor. Commander Sisko needs to see you in the Wardroom.
BASHIR: Tell him. Oh, tell him I'll be there shortly.
ODO: Now, Doctor!
KIRA: You'd better go.
BASHIR: Right.
KIRA: Peldor joi.

[Wardroom]

(Dax is using Sisko as a shield)
BAREIL: Please step aside, Commander. I need to talk to Jadzia.
SISKO: I don't think she wants to speak with you.
DAX: You tell him, Benjamin.
BAREIL: I only want to give her this.
SISKO: A Bajoran betrothal bracelet?
BAREIL: It's been in my family for generations.
DAX: Can I see that?
(Dax snatches the bracelet. Bashir and Kira enter, still entwined and kissing.)
JAKE: Nerys, am I glad to see you.
SISKO: Doctor, I need your help.
BASHIR: I need yours too. You've got to get me away from Kira. I can't keep my hands off her.
KIRA: And what's worse, I can't keep my hands off him.
ODO: I can't explain it either.
(Lwaxana enters and puts Odo's arms around herself.)
JAKE: She doesn't love me.
O'BRIEN: Who?
JAKE: Nerys.
O'BRIEN: You're better off. In the end, they only break your heart.
(Keiko enters, in the red dress)
O'BRIEN: Although sometimes it's worth it.
KEIKO: What do you think?
O'BRIEN: You look beautiful.
KEIKO: Did you really mean it about turning in your resignation?
O'BRIEN: Mmm hmm.
KEIKO: You'd better get it back before Commander Sisko sees it. It was nice of you to offer. (they kiss) I love you so much.
(Quark enters with food.)
QUARK: Hey! Commander, here's that I'danian spice pudding you ordered.
DAX: I want to give this to you as a token of my affection.
(Bareil's bracelet.)
BAREIL: Oh no you don't.
(Bareil punches Sisko.)
SISKO: Bareil, listen to me.
BAREIL: I'll fight for her if I have to.
(Bareil's punches make no impact on Sisko, then Dax intervenes and knocks Bareil down.)
DAX: I'm sorry, Benjamin. He was just starting to annoy me.
QUARK: Commander, you throw one hell of a party. Pudding, anyone? I've got I'danian spice pudding.
KEIKO: Are you all right?
QUARK: Pudding anyone? Doctor. Pudding any one?
LWAXANA: No, thank you.
(Lwaxana has a headache, and so does Quark.)
DAX: I'll take one.
QUARK: Help yourself.
(Quark gives Dax the tray.)
BAREIL: Why did she hit me?
QUARK: Forget about him. What about me? I need you, Keiko. My ears tingle at the sight of you. Marry me.
O'BRIEN: (grabbing his lobes) She's taken, Quark.
SISKO: Easy, Chief. He doesn't know what he's doing.
LWAXANA: What are you looking at me for?

[Infirmary]

LWAXANA: Zanthi fever? That's ridiculous, that's impossible. That only effects older Betazoids.
BASHIR: That may be, but according to my tests you show all the symptoms. Zanthi Fever is a virus which effects the empathic abilities of mature Betazoids. It causes them to project their own emotions onto others.
SISKO: Then Mrs Troi's amorous feelings for someone on the station were being passed along to the people around her.
BASHIR: Not everyone. Only those within close proximity to her when she had an attack. And even then there would have to have been some pre-existing latent attraction.
SISKO: You're saying Dax?
BASHIR: Only on a subconscious level. Best not think about it too much, if you ask me.
LWAXANA: I'm terribly sorry, Commander. I hope I haven't caused too much trouble.
SISKO: I'm sure no permanent harm was done. Right, Doctor?
BASHIR: A simple wide spectrum antiviral agent should cure Mrs Troi, and as for everyone else, well they'll be back to normal in a day or two. Excuse me. I promised Nerys that I'd meet her in her quarters this evening.
SISKO: I think you ought to postpone that visit for a day or two.

Commander's log, supplemental. I'm happy to report that Doctor Bashir's diagnosis has been proven correct. My son and all the other's affected by Mrs Troi's condition have made full recoveries.

[Promenade - upper level]

LWAXANA: This is one Gratitude Festival they'll be talking about for a long time.
ODO: I know I'll never forget it.
LWAXANA: I hope everything works out for you, Odo, with Major Kira.
ODO: I don't know what you mean.
LWAXANA: Don't worry, your secret's safe with me. After all, I know what it's like to be attracted to someone who doesn't necessarily feel the same way. If you get tired of waiting for her (she kisses him) you know where to find me.
ODO: I'll keep that in mind.

[Airlock]

KEIKO: So you're sure Doctor Bashir said your test results were negative?
O'BRIEN: That's right. My headache was just a headache. I never was affected by Mrs Troi.
KEIKO: Oh. I guess that means you don't have a latent attraction to me after all.
O'BRIEN: Nothing latent about it. Weren't you paying attention last night?
KEIKO: I was paying attention. You've still have the touch, O'Brien.
O'BRIEN: So do you. Take good care of Mommy, honey, okay?
MOLLY: I will.
KEIKO: See you in a few months.
O'BRIEN: I'll be here.
(Keiko and Molly leave. O'Brien catches a racquet.)
BASHIR: Chief?